Pissed off

I awoke drowsy this morning. I had been dreaming about being with Robin in the second floor bedroom of her Aunt and Uncle's house in Long Island. She and I were laughing and talking, though I don't remember the words. I sensed that we knew she couldn't leave this room but that I could come back and visit her anytime.

In my drowsy state my thoughts shifted. I began to think about how I now needed to make all the decisions and figure out finances on my own. Then, in a sort of shock I thought "why am I getting divorced??" After a moment of fear it dawns on me that Robin's gone and I'm laying in bed alone.

I suddenly feel let down and pissed off that I still have to wake up and "re-realize" that she's died. It's bad enough having to live it….