The Rest is Still Unwritten

Hmmm, recently I've been writing about things that happened over a year ago. I'd often felt the blog was incomplete because it started at the time of diagnosis and it only gave a brief history of preceding events. In my mind it didn't do a satisfactory job of conveying what the experience was like before the diagnosis. Originally I had thought about going back and filling in entries in chronological order – so events that occurred in May, June, July 2006 would appear in that part of the blog.

Instead I decided I would write about things as we came upon the anniversary dates. I guess it allows me to think back about things with a new perspective. I can't help but think that the bottom line is - it just helps for me to be writing :)

Oh well. I'll probably come across as schizophrenic, because at the same time I'm active in life again, so there are two parallel tracks of ongoing thought. There must be an eternal optimist in me because something inside feels like life is full of new opportunities, new possibilities – new friends to meet, new things to do, new activities to share. Occasionally I feel selfish that I should be feeling such optimism, but then I'm on my own path now and things are feeling OK. Hmmm...what is life except an opportunity to intersect paths with other people – some for a day, some for a month, some for years.

And finally, one last note for now. If I quoted every song that had some deeper meaning for me in the last few months the blog would have simply become a repository for lyrics. Anyway, of all the various songs, here are the lyrics from one song that continues to resonate with me whenever I hear it:

Natasha Bedingfield, "Unwritten"

I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten