Unencumbered

Sunday morning the alarm goes off at 6:15am for the weekly "bagel" bicycle ride. Typically a twenty mile route with a stop at the bagel store along the route. For the second week in a row my hand works its way out to the alarm clock, shuts it off, and retreats back under the covers. Whew - mornings are chilly this time of the year and anyway I've only had four hours of sleep.

Later I wakeup without the aid of the alarm clock. I think the first awareness in my brain is that of a white glowing light - before I even start thinking consciously or my eyes open. Like a computer powering-up, some background processes kick in which begin to inventory systems. Arms and legs intact? Warm enough? Need to get up and pee? All this is done autonomically before the core processes kick-in and I actually begin to have lucid thoughts.

Somewhere in this phase - before I start to understand that I'm beginning to think - an idea from Saturday starts ticking over in my head. I'd felt recently that there was an aimlessness in my blogging since I've just been writing about things that happen during the day (kayaking, biking, surgery in the 90's, making dinner). Then, as my brain begins to warm up it occurs to me that even the everyday stories include metaphors for me learning new things, exploring, not being worried about making mistakes, allowing myself to get lost, trusting my intuition. Like Robert, lately I don't seem encumbered by a lot of unnecessary thought about the activities I undertake, I just do them. I start to chuckle and then I know I'm awake. I guess I've been writing long enough that it's becoming second nature.